From the movie, Office Space (1998)
"It was a "Jump to Conclusions" mat. You see, it would be this mat that you would put on the floor... and would have different CONCLUSIONS written on it that you could JUMP TO."
- Tom Smykowski
I have been mulling over some occurrences recently....some interactions I have had with "friends"...folks that I felt I understood and trusted and that understood and trusted me....I have come to realize that there is a level of understanding and trust that I extend to people that seems not to come naturally to others, either because of their life experiences, some deep-seated self-doubt, a sort of protecting behaviour, because they have been hurt when trusting people before, or something else which I do not have the capacity to understand. All I do know for sure is that for these people, there is no question that all actions of others are first and foremost rooted in insidiously bad intentions...there is nothing that can be said or done EVER to change that ingrained, gut reaction. People like me get very frustrated with that sort of reaction....even when disappointed by people, I tend to let those things pass...there is nothing accomplished by holding grudges or keeping score...it only tends to hurt YOU and the person who you feel has disappointed you is often unaware of how serious you feel the injury was that they were responsible for.
My recent experiences have made me painfully aware that the wrestling match of trust that I have been having with a few of my "friends" can no longer continue....these people have already gotten their pre-release copy of the "Jump to Conclusions" mat and use it regularly with regard to me, and there is nothing I can ever do to change that behaviour. I feel like a failure as a friend for admitting that I am giving up the struggle, but that is something I will have to work through on my own....in the meantime, I will keep moving forward with my own good intentions and trusting attitude intact and hope for the best for the folks who insist on keeping their fatalistic outlook on people and relationships....
Till later, much love to you,